I remember when I cared about school. I used to dress up nice. I used to show up a little early to see my friends. I used to do my homework. I used to shower more than once a week.

It’s really hard to stay motivated when I have just over a month of high school left and only two actual classes. In fact, it’s really tempting to just give up going to school and just watch Netflix and sleep for the the next two months.

Here are my reasons for continuing to attend classes:

-I’ve been “sick” too many days this year alreadyI'm sick







-If I don’t pass English I actually won’t graduate

-I get to see my friends…who are just as depressed about being at school as I am

-I might meet a cute boy LOL JK

-When I stay home for two many days on end I start baking obsessively, and my dad’s cholesterol really can’t handle the fifteen cakes I might make

-I’ve already watched the first five seasons of Lost on Netflix but season six kind of sucks

(In case you were wondering, the last reason is the only one that’s motivating me go to school)


Mean Girls: A piece of cinematic genius

Okay, hear me out. I know that when you think about the movie Mean Girls, you first think, “Oh, right, that was when Lindsey Lohan was still cute and innocent and not on drugs/in jail.” Then your second thought is, “Oh yeah, that’s another one of those ridiculous and irrelevant teen comedies.”

But I would like to make the case that not only is Mean Girls a fantastic movie, but it’s also a more accurate depiction of modern teenagedom than just about anything else out there. (Also, it’s the only decent movie that Amanda Seyfreid has ever been in).

I like it because it shows how girls actually act in high school when they don’t like each other. There’s no straight out name calling like they tend to show in all those after school specials. That would be beyond uncool. Instead, girls are crafty. They make backhanded compliments, like Regina’s “Ooo I love your skirt, where’d you get it?” and then make all the nasty comments behind the girl’s back (Regina: “That is the ugliest effing skirt I’ve ever seen.”) And if you really want to hurt another girl, you do exactly what Cady did: you turn her friends against her and steal her boyfriend.

This all sounds quite harsh, and probably also over-dramatic. It happens though. I’ve only experienced bits and pieces, but I’ve seen a lot of these things happen over the years, mostly second hand. Mean Girls really captures the way high school can sometimes feel. You can begin to feel like that school is your whole world, and you begin to place too much value on things that aren’t really important in the grand scheme of things. All of a sudden the most pressing things in your life can end up being who is wearing what and who is dating who and who is not speaking to who. It can spiral out of control pretty fast (although I have yet to see anyone get hit by a bus over it)

It’s a really special thing when I writer really gets real life right. As Ray Bradbury said in Fahrenheit 451: “The good writers touch life often. The mediocre ones run a quick hand over her. The bad ones rape her and leave her for the flies.” And I think Tina Fey really does touch life with this one. I know it’s a comedy and it’s meant mostly for entertainment, but I also think that it carries a message that is authentic and important.

This must have been what my parent’s generation felt when they watched The Breakfast Club. Hell, I feel this same feeling when I watch a John Hughes movie. I guess it’s cool when a grown-up really gets it.

Now that the serious part of this post is over:

Mean Girls quotes that I literally use every day

“Boo, you whore.” (Every time a friend stays home sick)

“Stop trying to make fetch happen, it’s not going to happen Gretchen.” (you can replace fetch with just about any annoying phrase your friends use)

“Get in loser, we’re going shopping” (Pretty much any time I pick someone up in my car)

“FOUR FOR YOU GLEN COCO, YOU GO GLEN COCO! And none for Gretchen Weiners.” (You’d be surprised how much you can use this one in real life.)

And so ends the post where I somehow managed to tie Tina Fey, Ray Bradbury, and John Hughes together. You’re welcome, internet.

I have a nice butt (thanks for noticing)

The other day my fellow intern and I were walking to Subway for lunch when we passed a construction site. Not surprisingly, the workers started wolf-whistling and yelling all sorts of clever observations, such as “nice ass!” and “great rack!”

The intern, bless her heart, was horrified. She turned around, glared at the scruffy men, and flipped them the bird. And I? I turned around too. And I just smiled at them.

I recently read Tina Fey’s autobiography (which fyi I totally recommend; it’s both hilarious and insightful). Near the beginning of the book, Tina talks about an exercise done by Rosalind Wiseman, (author of the nonfiction book that Mean Girls was based on) in one of her self esteem seminars. She asked all of the grown women in the seminar to write down the moment where they first “knew they were a woman.” Almost every single woman answered that it was some guy yelling something nasty from a car or a construction site or something. Tina comments that, “There was pretty much zero examples of, ‘I first knew I was a woman when my mother and father took me out for dinner to celebrate my success on the debate team.'”

And yeah, I agree with Tina that it kind of sucks that most women associate some douchebag yelling explicit things at them as the moment they became a woman. But somewhere along the line, I also realized something. Those guys are going to yell junk at me no matter what I do. I suppose I could follow the lead of my dear intern friend and get angry. Or I could take it as a compliment.

So whenever a guy catcalls, I just think to myself: yes, random creepy stranger, I am quite womanly and I do have a nice butt. Thanks for noticing.

And then I smile.