Phrases you don’t want people to use when you ask them what you did last night

“You tried to kiss everyone. Like everyone.”

“You danced a lot. But you also fell more than you danced.”

“You were sitting on your ex’s lap.”

“I seriously left you alone for two seconds and you wandered off.”

“You were lying in a pool of your own puke.”

“I thought I would be mad at you for puking, but you just looked like a pathetic baby bird.”

“You were so funny; it made my night.”

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7 thoughts on “Phrases you don’t want people to use when you ask them what you did last night

  1. Bahahaha! One of my favorite posts on my new favorite blog. You are a very funny and talented writer! Why don’t you try writing 21 Jump Street 2.
    Peace

  2. Oh god – I’ve heard these phrases too often too… I’ll have to blog about some of my more epic times.

    Or maybe I shouldn’t… :p

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